Hi everyone I hope you are all fine by God’s grace. Today’s post is about holding a grudge.
I strongly believe that our friends can hurt us far more than strangers would. Perhaps, we’re even more hurt by the deeds of our friends because we couldn’t expect such behaviour from people who know us and who should care for us as we care about them, and who should care for our well-being as we care about theirs.
Has a friend of yours (really close friend) already hurt you so much that you are unable to tell the person? It happened to me (more than once).
Lately, a friend of mine said a certain number of things which really hurt me. I didn’t know how to react (that’s my friend after all), so I tried to act normally. However, I noticed a feeling deep down in my heart, subtle but strong enough such that I wasn’t able to feel close to any longer. As time went on, my friend hurt me even more, and I kept it for so long, that I was obliged to open up and say it all. Though we discussed about it, I didn’t obtain a satisfying response or at least a consolation for how I felt.
After that, I slowly became unable to commune with my friend, to speak openly, to share my feelings, and even to share joyful or sad moments together . I would always think about how I had been hurt and how I wasn’t understood, and that feeling built a serious wall in our relationship.
Do you know how we call that? – Grudge.
I didn’t realize it, but I was bearing a grudge against my friend.
Let’s look at what The Bible says about this :
Leviticus 19:18 KJV
Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the Lord .
God doesn’t want us to bear grudges against others. I guess that’s not easy, but His will is for us is to let go and be free.
Matthew 5:22-24 KJV
But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. [23] Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; [24] Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.
These verses are really powerful because they show something clear that some of us may not notice. When you’re having conflicts in your heart with someone it’s difficult to fully commune with God, it not only affects your relationship with the person but it also affects your relationship with God in one way or the other.
What’s the solution to grudge? – Forgiveness
Matthew 6:14-15 KJV
For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: [15] But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
Matthew 18:21-22 KJV
Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? [22] Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
At times it’s really difficult to even figure out that what you’re feeling is simply a grudge against your loved one. However, once you notice it, the best thing to do is to decide to forgive the person, to let go, and to move on.
Also, we may feel so broken that it’s hard to let go of the grudge and to forgive, but the parable of the talents has helped me lately, and can help you to let go of that grudge you feel right now (or the grudge you’ll feel someday).
1. We all have sinned against God
Matthew 18:23-25 KJV
Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants. [24] And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents. [25] But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made.
2. We’ve pleaded for God’s forgiveness
Matthew 18:26 KJV
[26] The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.
3. In Christ Jesus, God has forgiven us
Matthew 18:27 KJV
[27] Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt.
4. Others will sin against us, but we are expected to show the same grace to them that we have received
Matthew 18:28 KJV
[28] But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellowservants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest.
5. We can forgive them, as God forgave us
Matthew 18:29-30 KJV
[29] And his fellowservant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. [30] And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt.
6.We are expected to show the same grace that we have received
Matthew 18:31-34 KJV
[31] So when his fellowservants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done. [32] Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me: [33] Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee? [34] And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.
7. Forgive just as God forgave you
Matthew 18:35 KJV
[35] So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
When you realize how greatly God has forgiven you, it’s easier for you to forgive others despite how much they wronged you.
Prayer
God Almighty King of Glory, I pray that You may help me realize the grudges I still keep in my heart, that You help me forgive and let go. Also, please touch the hearts of all those who still bear a grudge against me, in Jesus Christ’s Name, Amen.
Thanks for reading.
God bless you.
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